Falling Hard

A lot of my college and high school friends have begun the typical post-college "let's all get married" summer. I know I don't have any desire to get married in any near future, but after countless weddings and showers and drunken receptions-- I feel...conflicted.

Ideally I want to build up my career, settle in my own place, and be by myself completely before I meet the person I want to marry. Even if I were to meet this person tomorrow, I'd want to wait for stability.

But then I was thinking-- I've been in relationships, good and bad, and never once even wanted to be with any of them long enough to consider marriage. People I know met their significant other in high school or college and are so sure marriage is the next and only step that they don't even have to verbalize it--you can read it in their faces.

I've never felt that at all for someone. Are we as single women with a college degree heading out into the working world supposed to believe that there is something wrong with us if we don't have a "ring by spring"?

Even the person I'm dating now-- we barely know each other and have dated for a little bit.

A lot of people say, if you don't meet someone in college, chances of meeting someone afterward get slimmer by the year. So I find myself thinking-- What if this is as good as it's going to get?





Today I am a little girl again. Do I only think I know myself and what I want?

Or is it me trying to harden to the idea of what many might see as failure?

Take Good Notes

On Tuesdays and Thursdays I intern at this ad agency, and so far it's not as interesting as I thought (and WAS SO SURE) it was going to be. I know everyone has to pay their dues and be the intern that prints lunch menus for the office and makes copies for a while, but wow. I would love a real task.

I get to spend a fair amount of time doing 'research' on the Internet.

It feels weird for me to have moved back in with my parents. It's only temporary-- until I can secure a real paying job, but temporary is about all I can stand. I really miss being in West Texas.

I was watching The Tonight Show with Conan. Coco, if you will, last night. It was, as expected hilarious. During the show I saw a the new GM commercial, and I have to say I'm impressed. If there was ever a commercial to offer hope for something that may or may not survive--this ad did it.

I'm Back

That's right. After two months or more of blogging silence, I realized that I was sharing a little more information with my friends that ideal. I'm sure they don't mind listening to me tell the fascinating narrative that is my life, but I like to keep up the mystery.

I've graduated from Texas Tech University, at the worst time to graduate from college EVER. But it's not all moving back in the with the parents, endless job searching and binge eating because I am afraid I'll never have a real self-supported lifestyle! I actually am doing an internship at an Ad agency in Uptown Dallas right now. I really really hope it turns into a full time job at some point in the future. Why? Because I have a 5 year plan.

I've been trying to cultivate my photography business, but have yet to make any real money because all of the people I take out for sessions are engaged friends.
Another huge disadvantage to leaving the blogging world for a while? I've really fallen out of touch with the vast amount of information the Internet has to offer

anyway. wtf. gtg.